Of all the sensations that can happen during sex, feeling like you need to pee is one of the odder ones. But feeling an urge to pee during sex is incredibly common, says Aleece Fosnight, MSPAS, PA-C, CSCS, CSE, NCMP, a board-certified physician assistant who specializes in sexual medicine and medical advisor to Aeroflow Urology. And many different factors could be causing it.
Worth noting: the feeling that you might pee during sex can actually be arousing for some who experience it. After all, when young people are first exploring their bodies, it’s common for them to mistake the build-up to an orgasm for an urge to urinate. The sensations preceding vaginal ejaculation can also feel similar to needing to pee. So it’s not a huge shock that the “need to pee” feeling isn’t always unwelcome during sex, Fosnight says. “The sensation of pressure on the bladder/urethra can increase pleasure and orgasm intensity for some vagina owners,” she notes.
But others may find the sensation of feeing like they have to pee during sex to be kind of uncomfortable. Fosnight explained that this may be the case if it’s not something that’s typically felt during sexual activity. “Having the feeling of needing to urinate can be distracting, cause less pleasure, and cessation of sexual activity earlier than desired,” Fosnight explained.
Why Do I Have to Pee During Sex?
Fosnight says that some potential reasons behind feeling an urge to pee during sex include: the position of sexual penetration, which can put pressure on the bladder or urethra; stimulation to the Skene’s glands, which are located on either side of the urethra; actually having a full bladder; pelvic floor muscle contraction; an overactive bladder; vaginal dryness; having a UTI; and constipation.
How to Stop Needing to Pee During Sex
If this specific feeling is bothersome or distracting rather than pleasurable, there are some things that might help ease it or prevent it entirely. Fosnight suggests using lube during sex and changing positions if the feeling crops up to start. You can also pee just before having sex (although there are health benefits to peeing just after having sex, so having a little urine in the tank while doing th deed isn’t necessarily a bad thing.) If none of those things help, try making sure you’re not constipated before having sex (and if you are, trying a constipation treatment).
If the sensation is really bothersome — or even if you like it, but it’s very strong and doesn’t go away when you pee before having sex — consider meeting with a pelvic floor physical therapist to assess the strength and weaknesses of the pelvic floor muscles, since overly tight or weak pelvic floor muscles may be a factor here.
Also be sure to mention the feeling to your OB/GYN. “Asking clarifying questions about your body is always encouraged!” Fosnight says. “It opens up the opportunity to normalize your body’s response to a pleasurable experience, or troubleshoot discomfort and find more enjoyable sexual activities. It also allows the provider an opportunity to rule out any concerns such as a urinary tract infection, pelvic floor dysfunction, and/or changes in the vulvovaginal mucosa.”
In the meantime, remember that it’s OK to ask your partner to pause so you can take a pee break. “It is always OK to communicate to your partner that you are having pelvic fullness and need to empty your bladder if in the middle of sexual activity,” Fosnight says. “You should always have pleasure and pain-free sexual encounters.”
— Additional reporting by Mirel Zaman
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